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Latest NewsThis site has surprised me in terms of how many people visit it on a regular basis, and so I'm continuing to try to keep it fresh and informative. I hope you'll find this new layout easy to read, easy to navigate and that you'll visit often and refer your friends.
We also started up our User Forum again, this time with a little more control over it so that we don't get a bunch of abuse from people trying to put junk posts in. We're hoping this area of the site will be something you'll find to be really useful!
You can tell others.In an effort to make sure that the information we've put together here is easy to find and useful to as many people as possible, we're constantly on the lookout for new ways to make use of all the latest social connection methods that are developing. One of those methods is the "Digg it" process. If you're not familiar with the Digg It site, it's basically a site where readers recommend web sites. If something is relevant, the people who found it useful can refer it to others. This is the ultimate in unbiased references! If you've never seen the site before, We've linked it here. If you think our site, is relevant to the topic of Divorce, you can refer it yourself to help make it easier for others to find us.
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Millicent Fenwick
It's all about the focus
One of the hobbies I enjoy, and I know a great many people do as well, is photography. One thing you learn as you start to get involved in photography is that Focus is critical. I'm not just talking about making sure a picture is in focus before you snap it, we all know that's important, but I'm talking about the larger issue of Focus here. In the movie industry, when some unknown person walks through a scene, and the camera follows that person to the next point of interest, that person is called a "focus puller". When you look at a painting or photograph, if the artist has done their job well, they will be able to control the focus of your interest in the picture through placement of key elements. The way you focus on an image is key to your overall impression of that image. It's the same way in life.
If you can keep your focus on something other than the emotional pain you are going through right now, you can begin to minimize it. The sooner you can minimize the role this emotional pain is playing in your day to day life, the sooner you will be able to get on with a happy life, and perhaps even find someone new to bring love and joy into your life.
Focus yourself on things that do bring you enjoyment. If you have a hobby, dive into it with as much enthusiasm as you can muster, it's given you enjoyment and satisfaction in the past, it can do it now. If you have good healthy friendships with people who are helping you move forward (be careful of those who only want to continue to beat the dead horse) then spend time with them. Find your passion for the things you've enjoyed in the past. Get your focus off the things that are dragging you down.
This little thing, easy to say, is going to be tough to do. You probably had your spouse with you before when you did a lot of the things you enjoyed. That's ok, give it a try and I'll bet you can still enjoy that thing. All I'm really talking about here is doing what I said before, choosing to get through this, and then acting on that choice. I truly believe that we can choose to be happy or sad. I think we can choose to succeed or fail. And I believe you can choose to NOT let this breakup ruin your life for years to come. I believe you can choose to be happy, choose to still enjoy life and even choose to move on and find someone new to love.
Now at this point, I'll once again make an appeal for you to visit our forum and talk back. I truly think we all have something to offer as we help each other get our lives back on track, and our forum is the place for you to have your say.