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Latest NewsPlease take a moment to sign up for our new Free Newsletter today, and we'll send you periodic information geared specifically towards getting you the on the road to recover as soon as possible. You're going through a tough time right now, whether you're trying to save your marriage or just get your divorce over as soon as possible, and the more informed you are, the more successful you'll be. It just takes a minute, it's free, and it's a great way to keep someone in your corner, offering advice and helping you get your life back on track.
I am basically an optimist, I tend to believe that good things will be coming along and I try to do what I can to make sure they do. With that in mind, I'm working through some changes to the section of the site specifically geared towards saving marriages.
From studying the patterns of the typical visitor to this site, it has become obvious that most people who visit are not yet divorced, and are looking for ways to avoid divorce, and so we're going to make sure if that's why you're here, you'll find what you need to help you be successful in your attempt to get through your whatever problems are affecting you right now.
If you find what you're looking for here, won't you help us spread the word? Send a link to a friend, mention us on your Facebook page, share a Tweet with someone. There's plenty of people out there who will thank you for sharing some positive information on this most negative of all subjects.
Millicent Fenwick
It's all about the focus
One of the hobbies I enjoy, and I know a great many people do as well, is photography. One thing you learn as you start to get involved in photography is that Focus is critical. I'm not just talking about making sure a picture is in focus before you snap it, we all know that's important, but I'm talking about the larger issue of Focus here. In the movie industry, when some unknown person walks through a scene, and the camera follows that person to the next point of interest, that person is called a "focus puller". When you look at a painting or photograph, if the artist has done their job well, they will be able to control the focus of your interest in the picture through placement of key elements. The way you focus on an image is key to your overall impression of that image. It's the same way in life.
If you can keep your focus on something other than the emotional pain you are going through right now, you can begin to minimize it. The sooner you can minimize the role this emotional pain is playing in your day to day life, the sooner you will be able to get on with a happy life, and perhaps even find someone new to bring love and joy into your life.
Focus yourself on things that do bring you enjoyment. If you have a hobby, dive into it with as much enthusiasm as you can muster, it's given you enjoyment and satisfaction in the past, it can do it now. If you have good healthy friendships with people who are helping you move forward (be careful of those who only want to continue to beat the dead horse) then spend time with them. Find your passion for the things you've enjoyed in the past. Get your focus off the things that are dragging you down.
This little thing, easy to say, is going to be tough to do. You probably had your spouse with you before when you did a lot of the things you enjoyed. That's ok, give it a try and I'll bet you can still enjoy that thing. All I'm really talking about here is doing what I said before, choosing to get through this, and then acting on that choice. I truly believe that we can choose to be happy or sad. I think we can choose to succeed or fail. And I believe you can choose to NOT let this breakup ruin your life for years to come. I believe you can choose to be happy, choose to still enjoy life and even choose to move on and find someone new to love.
Now at this point, I'll once again make an appeal for you to visit our forum and talk back. I truly think we all have something to offer as we help each other get our lives back on track, and our forum is the place for you to have your say.